Out of Left Field: She promises gluten-free recipes, then just yatters on and on ....
By Kyra Hoggan
I’m sorry I didn’t get this posted in time to make Sunday dinner – I’ll aim to post Sunday mornings from now on, but …well, it’s Sunday morning, so don’t watch the clock. Cartoons end when they end, man.
The reason for my tardiness is that I couldn’t settle on a recipe – I kept deciding on one, then thinking of another and changing my mind, then remembering that rib recipe that was so fabulous, then …
Finally, I settled on starting off with some tips and tricks to making the diet easier, with recipes to follow.
I also reported on a political event this morning and lost my appetite for a bit, there (just kidding, it was actually a lot of fun!).
Tip 1: Almost every recipe is improved with the addition of one-and-a-half cups of wine. Reserve one third of the liquid. Pour the remainder into a fancy glass that makes you feel special, and sip while preparing dinner. Use reserved liquid to refill glass when you serve dinner.
I forgo this step, myself, because I often measure incorrectly and suck back the whole bottle, but I suspect most aspiring gourmands may find it useful.
Tip 2: Stir-fries are so healthy and delicious – but SUCH a hassle without soy sauce or any of the commercially prepared sauces, most of which are verboten (soy sauce has gluten AND soy, so it’s a double whammy. You can buy it gluten-free, but I don’t recommend soy to anyone with a gluten issue).
Instead, when you make stock (ALWAYS make stock, it’s easy and there are 1,000 recipes to be found on Google for any meat. Go with the simpler ones, they’re usually better), freeze it in ice cube trays.
When they’re they’re frozen, chuck them in a freezer bag, and when you make stir-fries, toss two or three in with your browned meat to form the foundation of your sauce.
Also, freeze single-portion containers (you can buy them in threes at the dollar store) and some rice noodles – the kids get home, chuck it in a pan, throw in the noodles and viola! Like Ramen or Ichiban noodles, only easier, healthier and better-tasting.
Tip 3: Fruit is a terrific sauce option – garlic and ginger pair well with virtually any fruit juice, especially if you add some heat with red pepper flakes or fresh hot peppers. Believe it or not, three or four tablespoons of Five-Alive will add depth and flavour to your stir-fry, if it’s adequately spiced.
Tip 4: Your spice cabinet should overflow, and if you can access the fresh stuff, totally do it (I have a tiny spice garden just outside my kitchen window. I just run out with the scissors – yeah, I know, don’t run with scissors, whatever – and harvest whatever I need)
As for knowing what to use, start with recipes … then, when you get comfortable with your spice rack, you can start experimenting. In my experience, your nose will tell you what works and what doesn’t. If the chicken is cooking and you’re bored with the usual, stand near the chicken pan and sniff your spice jars (be sure to sneeze away from the pan). If they smell delicious together, they’ll probably taste that way, too. After a while you’ll stop bothering with measurements and just toss spice around in a devil-may-care free-for-all (especially if you’re keen on Tip 1).
I’ll try to remember to do up a list of MUST-HAVE spices, like cumin, oregano, hot pepper flakes, etc. Feel free to remind me if you don’t see it posted sometime soon.
Tip 5: ALWAYS read the label. Twice now, my family has been blindsided by a product we buy so often we no longer check the ingredients. So we don’t realize it when the manufacturer changes ingredients (which, I’m telling you now, they often do). The five minutes you’ll spend in a week reading labels is well worth saving you the days … sometimes weeks … of misery that accompany a mistake.
Tip 6: ASSUME NOTHING! Some things you just assume are safe – like, what kind of a moronic zipperhead puts dairy in antihistamines? Most of them, it turns out. There’s only one antihistamine on the market that we’re allowed (that I’m aware of). Vegetable dishes chock full of gluten. Meat with soy in it. Makes no sense, but trust me, it’s true. The zipperheads are everywhere.
Tip 6: Eat no prepared meats that aren’t labelled GDS (gluten-diary-soy) free, or unless the manufacturer is willing to confirm in writing that they’re safe. If they flour their meat grinders to make sausages, or their conveyor belts for burger patties, they’re under no obligation to report it as an ingredient. Likewise look for ‘allergy alert’ statements on the label, but don’t assume their absence means it’s safe to eat. Pretend you’re McCarthy and the manufacturers are suspected Communist actors – paranoia isn’t always a bad thing.
MOST IMPORTANT TIP: Have fun with it. If just reading the recipe makes you want to cry with exhaustion … don’t make it. Duh. And if you just can’t manage a meal today, go ahead and feed the family leftovers. Better yet, make them heat it up themselves and take that wine and a good book to the bubble bath.
Food has become a chore for too many of us. It should be one of the most joyful, fun parts of our lives (Dev and I eat in front of the TV, but we grocery shop and cook together, and we have a blast doing it. And he’ll go off to college and eat better than any million-dollar yuppy kid there dreams of doing, too. So THERE, million-dollar yuppy brat.)
I promise a recipe next week, and until then, happy eating!
Ed. Note: I was just advised, by one of my readers, as to the traditional (and vile) meaning of the term `zipperhead`. In my lexicon, it only means ìdiot`- I had absolutely no idea of its connotation. I`m deeply sorry for my mistake and will never use the word again, but ask for the purposes of this column, please read the word to mean `someone who is acting stupid`. Thank you.
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