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OP/ED: Halloween become a whole new kind of scary

Christine Esovoloff
By Christine Esovoloff
October 25th, 2012

It’s almost Halloween! Yay! I have always been a Halloween fan; I love the decorations, the pumpkin carving, and the plethora of bite-sized chocolates, but there is one thing that really gets my goat when it comes to this spooky season – it is impossible to find a women’s costume that isn’t oozing with sex. Why can’t I find something to wear that doesn’t look like I’m heading out to sell slices of love on the street corner?!

Seriously, what’s with that?! What if I don’t want to look like a lady of the night or a stripper? (No offense to either profession).

I’ll admit, I like to wear sexy little outfits as much as the next girl, but I think that things have gone a little too far when it comes to Halloween. What if I don’t want to look sexy or slutty, what if I am going for a frumpy look this year?! You know, a scary ugly witch or troll or zombie? Well, good luck findingthat at your local chain store!

I was recently in the States and had the pleasure of going to a huge Halloween warehouse, in hopes of finding something to wear trick-or-treating with my kids. I walked in and was bombarded with rows and rows of costumes and decorations. Excited to see what I would find, I asked the clerk where I could find the women’s costumes … “Back wall.” she said. So away I went, traipsing through the aisles to get to my section. Well, I found it all right … and there were LOTS to choose from. There was a sexy nurse, sexy doctor, sexy cop, sexy maid, sexy captain, sexy flight attendant, sexy conservation officer, sexy pirate, sexy princess, sexy vampire, sexy ghost, sexy hippy, sexy rock star, sexy witch, sexy sailor, sexy gypsy, sexy zombie, sexy fairy, sexy angel, sexy geisha, sexy clown, sexy ninja, SEXY, SEXY, SEXY!

Oh, and then they got really creative with a just plain ‘sexy lady’ costume! Boy, I was really taken aback by the ingenuity of that one, I tell ya!

And let’s not forget the animal costumes! They had a sexy bunny, sexy kitten, sexy fox, and a sexy skunk! I’m not sure about you, but the last time that I saw a skunk, it sure as heck didn’t have cleavage! Sheesh!

Even some of the little girls’ costumes are too suggestive for my liking. What are we teaching our children? Halloween should be spooky, scary, creepy, and most of all, fun! But now the theme words for Halloween seem to be skimpy, naughty, and sleazy (yeah, I know, sounds like a few of Snow White’s dwarfs).  My point is, our children are soaking it all up like sponges and you’ve got to admit … Halloween has become a little over-sexed.

Now, there is nothing wrong with wearing a spicy little costume if that’s your thing. Like I said before, I enjoy hot little outfits as much as the next person. And I know that not ALL the ladies’ costumes are suggestive or sexy (just the vast majority), all I’m asking for is a few more options. Maybe some choices that cover up more than a third of my body would be nice?! I mean, what will my son say when he sees me dress up in the cowgirl outfit I bought? My guess is “Mom, why is your bum showing?” or “Mom, don’t cowgirls wear pants?”

(Sigh) “Yes dear, they do normally wear pants.”

So, what’s a concerned girl to do? Well, I’ll tell you this much, I am going to ditch that cowgirl get-up and go for a totally new look. I am going to find the frumpiest, most un-sexy, unrevealing costume that I can come up with. So while you’re trick-or-treating, if you see some unattractive, lumpy, haggard looking, costumed Mom walking down the street with Iron Man and a dinosaur, honk or say hello! Or if I have offended you by the content of this column, just try to refrain from running me over. Please.

Wishing you all a very happy, spooky, scary, chocolaty, but totally un-sexy Halloween!

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